2018 snippets from journals

01-02

I don’t cut ties; I let go.

01-03

LIVE FREE :) Maging malaya at mapagpalaya. Mga gawaing magagawa sa paglaban para mabuhay, sa paglaban sa kanilang mga ipinapataw na pantasya, at sa pag-akay sa mga tao at grupong nais ding lumaya.

01-06

I know how to move conversations.

01-15

I’m so tired. I want my heart to rest. I want someone to carry it for me. But not everyone can. And there are those who can but won’t.

Maybe somewhere out there, there are people who can and will. But right now, the people around you aren’t those.

01-22

A refusal to mistake high, pleasure, loneliness, need, longing, and company, for love.

02-07

My friend’s ig handle is chasingsummers. I’ve always liked it because it’s such an active description of longing. And I guess because it has a goal too. There is something fighting in it. It reminds you that you want to fight for something?

02-11

Being in limbo, out of the routine of the usual world, brings its own insight and perspective needed to imagine a different world.

03-08

(You can intellectualize your experience later hehehe.)

03-30

The best meaningful scenarios came about in their own way. Huwag mong pangunahan.

04-25

Anyway, things that I loved about him today.

04-26

1.) recognize that it is an obsessive behavior and that it doesn’t define you

05-02

He pays attention. A lot. That’s what draws people to dangerous people…

06-02

ALL IS FAIR IN SELF-PRESERVATION AND WAR, RIGHT?

Might as well be on the “principled” side if needed to participate.

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO YOUR ANGER TOO.

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO CLAIM YOUR AGENCY IN THIS MESS.

06-02

Let yourself be done with people who avoid their emotions. Let yourself be done with unavailability, in whatever form they are.

06-06

Still, I feel that the right decision right now is to just let things be… not because of fear of losing or hope of gaining.

07-08

As long as he’s giving me what I “want” right now, it’s alright.

08-01

he lets me talk about my past without being weirded out

08-19

Now, we have established a routine of some sort.

09-03

Nakakatakot
iguhit ang iyong mukha
sa aking palad.

10-07

YOU ARE DOING FINE. YOU ARE ALIVE AND YOU WORKED TOWARDS THIS LIFE.

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